Since becoming a parent I have realized that my husband and I need to focus on US. It may be hard to realize it, but sometimes life gets in the way. Parents end up becoming roommates and co-workers to their children and forget that being a couple really means more than that. I have said this before, I am BLESSED to have the means to do things with my husband and can leave our girls with people we trust, family and friends. I truly hope that everyone can find someone that they trust to watch their twins and go enjoy time with their spouse. Time with your partner should be a priority to you.
When my husband and I met, we had always talked about going snowboarding and for years it’s all we would want to do, this winter, many years down the line it became a reality. We don’t live too far away from several resorts that we can jump in the car and drive to. California has been very lucky with the rain we have gotten over the last few months and that meant some amazing snow up in the mountains. We had the perfect opportunity to make it a fun day date. The night before we left I dropped the twins and our dog off at my mom’s house, we had a small take out dinner and went to bed pretty early.
The next morning, we got up well before the sun came up, made a quick stop to get coffee and headed up the mountain. I semi knew what the temperatures were going to be like, but when you’re used to our warm weather, 14*F is a shock and a half. We arrived at the resort and picked up our snowboards and headed for the lifts. The last time I went snowboarding, I was in my early 20’s and was way less cautious. I had to jog my memory on how to do everything and not make a total fool of myself. It took us, me, a while to get down the mountain every time we did a run. My husband waited for me, took pictures of me, and I’m pretty confident he laughed at me 90% of the time. It was an amazing day where it was just US. No kids, limited responsibilities and we could do what we wanted to when we wanted to.
It is easy for parents to forget that we are a couple. I know I get stuck in the hamster wheel of life and go through the motions of my day to day life. If you told me any day and time I could probably tell you where I am and what I’m doing and who I am with. I forget that I need to make sure my marriage is strong, in order for my family to be a strong unit. Going snowboarding, or to dinner, or having movie night on the couch with just my husband, I notice makes the biggest difference in the world. I know we are a few months into the year already, but I propose a “New Year’s resolution” to everyone. Find time for just you and your spouse. It can be once a month, once a week, or even once a day, and be with your spouse. It doesn’t have to be anything as extravagant as trip snowboarding, but be alone with your spouse. Remind them why you both chose each other, rekindle that spark that might have been dimmed with the craziness that is parenthood of multiples.
Robyn Gogue is currently a stay at home mom to her 5 year old fraternal twin daughters, Kayden and Kaylee, and wife to her husband, Roy. She is currently pursuing her career in the medical field. Follow Robyn on Facebook here. For articles by Robyn on Twiniversity, click here.
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