Bottle Refusal Tips for Twin Parents (from an IBCLC)

With feeding taking up a large part of your day with infant twins, nothing may feel more overwhelming than dealing with one (or two) babies refusing a bottle! Thankfully, twin parent expert and IBCLC Natalie Diaz is here to drop her knowledge on all the bottle refusal tips!

Heading back to work and trying to get on a solid bottle feeding schedule? Transitioning from breast to bottle? Suddenly encountering a baby who wants nothing to do with the bottle?

Any version of bottle refusal can make twin parenting feel all the more overwhelming.

But rest assured, you’re in the right place to learn more about bottle refusal and expert tips on how to help your baby successfully take a bottle.

(Note: This article and the associated video are sponsored by Pigeon bottles, a bottle brand trusted by IBCLCs worldwide.)

First, what are signs of bottle refusal in newborns and infants?

Bottle refusal can look slightly different from one baby to the next. But below are some common bottle refusal signs:

Your baby may:

Clamp their mouth shut
Turn their head
Try to push you away
Cry or fuss
Gag
Puke

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Why do babies refuse a bottle?

There are a variety of reasons a baby may refuse a bottle. For babies who are used to being breastfed, the most common reason is that the bottle isn’t the same as a mother’s boob.

Think about it like this: your baby worked really hard to master feeding at the breast, and now they’re being asked to learn a completely new way to suck down their nutrition. It’s like completely flipping the script on them.

Other reasons a baby may start showing signs of bottle refusal include:

They’re not hungry
They’re too tired (bottle feeding takes work)
They’re belly hurts or they feel unwell
They had a negative experience with the bottle previously
They don’t like the bottle, the taste/temperature of the milk or formula
They’re in an uncomfortable position

While you may not be able to pinpoint exactly what the reason is at first, take a deep breath because there are some blanket tips you can try below that can help you get back on track with bottle feeding.

5 Bottle Refusal Tips from IBCLC Natalie Diaz

Bottle Refusal Tip 1: Reset Your Expectations

Bottle refusal is not fixed in a single feeding. The goal is practice, not perfection and exposure and comfort, not volume.

Instead: success can look like a few sucks, licking the nipple, or staying calm near the bottle.

Reframing your own expectations about what success with bottle feeding looks like will help you take the pressure off of both yourself and your baby.

Bottle Refusal Tip 2: Timing Is Everything

Avoid trying to introduce the bottle when the baby is frantic or starving. A hungry or tired baby is already experiencing a certain level of stress, so this does not make for an effective time to introduce a new skill or a practice that they are still working on (aka bottle feeding).

Offer the bottle when the baby is calm, awake, and slightly hungry, which is about 20 to 30 minutes before a usual feeding.

Stop if the baby escalates. This is key as it will help you avoid having your baby associate a negative experience with bottle feeding.

twin lactation consultant Natalie Diaz — Learn more and book your consult!

Bottle Refusal Tip 3: Practice, Practice, Practice

A lot of folks think that when a mother or primary caregiver is struggling to bottle feed their baby that it’s a good time for someone else to step in to try to help. While this may be well-meaning, oftentimes, it ends up causing more distress for the baby.

This doesn’t mean that no one else should help with bottle feeding. But in the beginning when the baby is first learning to bottle feed, it’s helpful to keep things consistent and have the primary caregiver whom the baby feels an intimate sense of trust with be the one doing the bottle feeds until the baby really gets the hang of it.

Two other helpful tricks to practice are: ensuring the baby’s body is fully supported and having the mother gently coach them with the bottle while singing. This creates an environment free from pressure and stress.

Bottle Refusal Tip 4: Be Mindful of How You Offer the Bottle

When it comes to introducing bottle feeding, technique matters.

This looks like:

Holding the baby upright (not on their back)
Holding the bottle like you would hold a marker
Resting your hand gently on their chest
Placing the bottle at the opening of their mouth
Offering the first few sips gently
Then giving your baby a chance to establish their own pace that feels comfortable

If you notice your baby struggling at any point, you can try pushing the nipple into the corner of their mouth.

Keep in mind that if they begin to show signs of distress, it’s not that they’re being dramatic. They’re trying to protect themselves from choking.

Twiniversity Tip: Pigeon bottles are a great option for bottle feeding as their nipples very closely mimic a mom’s breast and they support a deep latch that lets the baby better control the flow.

Pigeon Bottles to help twin babies with bottle refusal — Pigeon bottles can help with preventing bottle refusal or managing bottle refusal since they closely mimic a mother’s breast.

Bottle Refusal Tip 5: Create Positive Associations With Bottle Feeding

The final key tip with bottle feeding is to ensure that it remains a positive experience. This allows you to build trust with your baby as they learn and get better at the bottle.

If at any point, you feel that the baby has created a negative association with bottle feeding, give yourself some grace and try to reset the experience.

You can do this by offering the bottle when the baby is cuddly, not very hungry, and not expected to finish it. You can also take the pressure off by allowing the baby to explore the nipple by touching it to their lips without forcing.

Other helpful ways to build a more positive association with bottle feeding look include warming the bottle a little so it’s more like the temperature of fresh breastmilk or incorporating some light motion. You can try slowly walking, swaying, or gently bouncing the baby as you bottle feed them, rather than settling in one spot.

When to get support from an expert for bottle refusal?

If you’ve tried the above bottle refusal tips and are still experiencing tons of bottle difficulties with one or both of your twins, it may be time to enlist the support of an IBCLC or a pediatric feeding therapist.

Here are some signs it’s time to ask for help:

You are returning to work within the next few weeks.
Your baby is consistently refusing bottles.
Feeding attempts are increasingly stressful.
The baby’s suck is too weak.
Everyone is overwhelmed.

Remember, if your baby is struggling with or refusing the bottle, it’s not your fault and your baby is not broken. With the right strategy and support, your baby can learn to take a bottle successfully.

You can schedule a twin lactation consult with IBCLC—who’s also a twin mom herself—Natalie Diaz.

You can also reach out to Early Intervention or a local pediatric feeding therapist.