Parents of twins answer the question, “When does it get easier?” and the answers may surprise you. Does it ever get easier, or just different?
As a parent to young twins, you are probably wondering, “Does it ever get easier? And exactly WHEN does it get easier?!“
We polled our Twiniversity fans to ask this very question. Does it ever get easier? Or does it just get “different”? Here’s what people had to say…
My boy/girl twins are 4 years old. I’ve learned it doesn’t get easier, it just gets different. Sure, they can feed themselves and don’t wear diapers anymore, but now I have to break up fights and address back-talking.
Getting them in school full time can help but mine are in school full time and I still go crazy. In my opinion, rather than hope for it to get easier, it might be better to accept the craziness of twins. Because along with the craziness comes twice the hugs, twice the flowers on Mother’s Day, and twice the love.
Mine are 16 years old and I can say that it does get easier but it will get harder first. The struggles change, first from trying to keep your sanity now, to moving on to elementary school and dealing with their friends, to the nastiness in middle school, to the anxiety of learning to drive, to the college prep classes in high school, to thinking of them out and living on their own….. It still will be the best job you’ll ever have. Invest the time now, as hard as it is, and you will reap the benefits later.
My twins are two and some days I wish I had the sleepless newborns back. I swear I need to run around all day carrying a whistle, wearing black and white stripes.
A lot of people wonder why I am so stressed. “It should be easy because they have each other to entertain themselves.” I keep telling myself that once they get beyond the self centered child stage and learn to talk it should get easier. Maybe it will or maybe easy is just overrated.
Mine just turned 2 and while it’s still hard they are asserting themselves. I would never go back to the baby stage! LOL! Maybe it’s because I have an older son, too, so I know how fast this goes. I suggest keeping them busy ALL.THE.TIME. Mine go to daycare during the week, but on weekends we have to be nonstop. At the playground and outside in general. Bubbles, chalk, chasing birds, etc. They want to explore and learn.
Yeah, I do struggle with keeping them occupied all the time as I work from home part-time too. And I can’t get it all done in their nap time (which some days doesn’t even happen!) I definitely find we all feel better when we’ve gone from activity to activity. Less time for them to get bored and start misbehaving.
Every age has its challenges, but I think it does get easier at 4-5 years old when they become a bit more independent. Then when they get themselves ready for school at age 8, you wonder where your babies went.
I was told “it gets easier” when my two were babies, and I grasped on to that for the next few years. Yes, certain aspects do get “easier”, but raising a child is never “easy”, and 2 the same age adds a different dynamic that not everyone can understand.
But remember you have been blessed with this adventure and it really does go by faster than you could ever imagine. Try to enjoy each and every moment, even when it does seem to be getting harder.
Mine are 14… ages 11-13 made me long for the toddler years! Middle school is easier physically but super hard emotionally. I sooo miss sticky hugs and “I love you mommy”.
I felt 2 was easier than 1; 3 was easier than 2; 4 is now easier than 3…and so it goes…I guess until the teens!
Mine are two, and every day is definitely a struggle! The more they can do for themselves, the less they want to do it my way. But it helps to appreciate all of the things they do to make your heart melt. As much as I look forward to the day they are in school, I know I’ll miss this.
For me, it really helps when my husband and I split them up for a few hours so we can spend some time with just one of them bonding. I swear it improves their behavior a little and gives us a chance to really see them as individuals. A little time out with a babysitter is nice, too, when I’m feeling worn down.
My girl twins just turned 6. I don’t think it gets “easier”, but it changes and is different. The older they get the less adjustment is required on my part. They become more independent (which has its own pros and cons). Hang in there, every age has its own unique challenges but it’s all good.
2.5 was awful for us. I didn’t think I would ever get through it. My girl twins are 4.5 now and in the last couple of months it’s become much easier. Even grocery shopping isn’t completely horrible. We have moments but I can bring them to a park and watch them both now. I can almost have a full conversation with an adult when they are at play dates. Hang in there!
I despise the word easier. And I tell you it never will be easier. It gets better and more fun and more enjoyable but anyone that tells me it gets easier needs their head read. Easier than what? Before kids? NEVER.
There’s more shopping, washing (OMG the washing), the mess, more beds to strip, more dishes … the list goes on. So no, I don’t think it ever gets easier until they move out and it’s just you and hubby again. Then enjoy the quiet until the grandkids come along. LOL!
I have a 9 yr old daughter and twin daughters that just turned 6 yrs old. This year, midway through Kindergarten, the twins started needing me less & each other more. All my prayers started falling in place. Our house is more peaceful. Mornings became easier. Now, I actually have a little me time to enjoy my hobbies again. I wish you the best of luck. Thank God for milestones.
My boys are five and I am just now to a point where I feel like I can make it through the day without having a breakdown. It is hard, there is no doubt about that. But I remind myself on the bad days that they will only be little for so long.
The time is flying by at record speed and pretty soon they will be starting school. Two and a half was the second hardest time for us. The first six months were the worst. It will get better at about three / three and a half. Hang in there momma!
My girls are 2 years and 3 months… This stage is so much easier than the first 6 months. Remember that?
I think every stage has its challenges and blessings. You just have to figure out what works for your family.
Three was tough, very tough! My girls just turned 4 and I see and feel a noticeable difference. We are all sleeping better and eating civilized meals at the table. And daily there seem to be spurts of calm. It feels nice!
My twin girls just turned three! It’s not easier but I would never want to go back to the baby stage EVER AGAIN!
I was told that it would get easier too. What I concluded was that every year was just different. When you change your expectations to adjust to their ages and abilities it makes more sense than thinking it will get easier. My identical boys are 11 and it isn’t easy but it has changed over time.
My twins are nine. My best answer is that things change. Do they get easier? Maybe in some situations. But as they get older you have different things to deal with.
I have 2.5 yo twins (and a 6 mo singleton) and they have never been harder. We hit a sweet spot with them between 1 yr and about 20 months old – which was when we decided to have the new baby. If we had waited a year, I don’t know that we would have had our third child.
I just keep telling myself it will all be worth it in the end… and occasionally I see glimpses of that time. I try to find one moment a day that I can revel in and enjoy rather than the pressure of trying to “enjoy every moment with them because they grow up so quickly”. To me, that is impossible at this point and makes me feel overwhelmed and miserable.
My boy twins just turned 4 and I have noticed a big difference. I think at that age they start to follow directions, express their wants and needs and understand consequences. Hang in there!!!